I have had lots of life times within one lifetime – as an artist/performer, as a business owner, and lots of harrowing adventures. I have been initiated by all four elements where I barely escaped with my life (earthquake, hurricane, tornado and fire). This Saturn return I beat triple negative breast cancer in 2012. On the last full moon I found out the cancer is back apparently with a vengeance and is in my lungs now. I read Dana’s article about death and am wondering if, perhaps, this might be the next big adventure for me. I would love to know if moving back to California where my kids and grandkids are would help this overall. If so, my husband and I live on disability so I wonder if we could make ends meet. I have never been one to complain but this is getting to be a bit much. Astrologers keep telling me about my grand trine and how it eases my life. I will say that I have had extreme highs of miraculous things happening but the lows are equal in all ways. I really could be happy with a bit less drama. I was on the verge of thinking I might sing again and, of course, this is now impossible. Today is the New Moon when I am headed to the oncologist for a consultation. If you have any insight, I would most appreciate it. My birthday is March 26, 1954. (GB) Lots of lifetimes in one lifetime is a common feature of the lives of Scorpio Suns, Moons or Ascendants whose purpose is intensified growth through profound, often life altering or life threatening, experiences. You describe this life or death pattern in your life as an initiation by all four elements, harrowing adventures and now a serious illness. Not only is Scorpio the sign of your Ascendant, it is also your Saturn sign and you are a Mars ruled Aries with your natal Pluto in your cardinal 10th house; all further intensifying your life and life experiences. There is always the potential for an end of our life at each Saturn return though it is less common at the 1st Saturn return, more common at the 2nd Saturn return and very common at the 3rd Saturn return. Clearly, there is no necessity that you will pass due to your Saturn return though it does make this return of cancer all the more concerning. There are other concerning or clarifying aspects pointing to your illness – your progressed Sun has just entered your 8th house which is the house of death; transiting Neptune is nearing a conjunction to your 8th house ruler, Mercury; your progressed Mercury is opposing your natal Mars (ruler of your health house) from the 8th house; your solar arc progressed Mercury is approaching an opposition to your natal Saturn; your solar arc progressed Mars is nearing an opposition to your natal Pluto; your solar arc progressed Neptune is conjunct your natal Mars; and transiting Uranus has entered your 6th house. All of these indicators do describe a serious, life threatening illness over a period of several years which began in the last year or so and continues for at least another year. Death may be your next great adventure, however, not a one of these aspects is or should ever be considered a prediction of death. You are wise to trust your strong natal Saturn, the ruler of traditional medicine, to find a trustworthy doctor to treat your illness as you did before which may well have the same successful outcome or at least give you another 1-5 years to live (many aspects indicate this possibility). In addition, it seems wise to add some serious alternative care if you believe in its efficacy and can do so. How you live now is very important to your treatment, therefore, I would use Jupiter’s current transit to your 9th house to move where your heart and family are calling you. I think you can find a way to manage the move and expenses in more expensive California. Your description of your grand trine experiences is more accurate than the idea that it will necessarily ease your life in any material way which it may or may not depending on the planets, signs and houses it occupies as well as the rest of the chart. Your grand trine in fire does enhance your spirit, your talents, your adventurous life and does contribute to some of the more miraculous events and opportunities you have had, however, it does not dispel your rising Saturn quincunxing your Sun nor your natal Mars conjunct your Moon quincunxing your Uranus. Yes, this is surely “a bit much” which is the time to call on the power of your fiery spirit, your strength, and your 12th house Neptune ability to envision a healthy outcome along with the synchronicities needed to bring that outcome into reality. You will feel clearer when Jupiter soon moves out of Cancer where it has been conjuncting your Uranus and South Node of the Moon and moves into Leo where it will support your grand fire trine; when transiting Saturn completes its square to your natal Pluto in the next several months. Is there another creative goal you can envision as transiting Jupiter moves across your Midheaven in the fall, a successful or joyful opportunity for you? I hope your prognosis is a hopeful one now that transiting Mercury is direct. “You have plutonian eyes,” a friend told me some time ago. He had been studying archetypal Astrology for several years and now says it has been one of the most significant tools he has found in helping him understand his life, and life in general. I am very new to Astrology. I am trying to understand what my friend means about my connection to Pluto. I was born December 2, 1974. I can tell you that as long as I remember, I’ve felt challenged by external and internal pressures – issues of race since I am a multigenerational mixture of cultures but the Deep South doesn’t like ambiguity when it comes to the border patrol of race and one’s place in the society. I also contend with issues of gender since the closest label I can find to put to my experience is “asexual”. It doesn’t fit perfectly since I am heterosexual and very much attracted to men but my attractions manifest mostly at a soul level rather than a physical one. Growing up in our very over-sexualized society, I felt for many years like there was something deeply wrong with me. There is much strife in my family. I never bonded with my mother who was emotionally and physically abusive. Though I speak with my father on the phone regularly, I live far away from my parents and haven’t seen them in nearly a decade. Nor have I spoken to my brother in years. We were close during our adolescent years as allies forged against my mother’s cruelty and coldness, however, we chose such different ways of dealing with our common issues that now it feels as though we never even knew each other. I am a musician and writer who has never cared about success in the eyes of the world. In youthful idealism, I wanted to “change the world’ by telling its most authentic story. Yet I suffered through years of debilitating stage fright, fears of failure and exposure. Thus, I have never taken off. In times past it was satisfying enough but, as I approach 40, I find that issues of financial security and also the stirrings of desire for a fuller creative experience challenge me. I feel very anxious, restless, and, quite frankly, unprepared for the future. I feel like more of a jack of all trades rather than a master. Concerning relationships, there have been several significant losses, but nothing as traumatic as the death of my partner over five years ago. This loss challenged everything I believed about love, spirituality and about the nature of life itself. I’m still learning and integrating lessons. Most of us ebb and flow through life, sometimes losing, other times gaining. I feel like my life has been one of constant erosion against the surface I was born into. My life experiences have been the purifying heat steadily burning and getting hotter. My relationship with Spirit is very strong. There is a spiritual intimacy that exists for me and I do feel, at times, that I am being guided and led to some significant place. For years I have known that my presence in other’s lives does elicit some strong reactions as I hold other’s emotions. Yet that quiet act of soul awareness makes others very afraid of me. At this point, I live alone with lots of acquaintances but only two friends I trust I can be wholly myself with. I don’t feel like a victim knowing that my life experiences have all been chosen, either consciously or intuitively. I do wonder, however, what insights Astrology might offer me as I approach this milestone year in regard to my deeper connection to Pluto. I would like, at some point, to come out of my crucible. I would surely like to know what kind of vessel I am being shaped into and how I can most be of service. Any insights you can share will be greatly appreciated. I do read your column and appreciate the depth you provide in your responses. (DG) “Plutonian eyes” is a mesmerizing image and, yes, one you deserve with your natal Moon rising in Cancer (the Ascendant does describe our appearance) and your natal Pluto conjunct your IC opposing your MC where it is strong enough to be felt, seen by those who have eyes to see and to determine the shape of your life. Though I edited your email due to its length, you wrote a perfect, moving description of a Pluto life – challenged by external and internal pressures, seeing yourself outside of conventional labels of race and gender, feeling like there is something wrong with you, family strife, significant losses in relationships even death, “purifying heat steadily burning and getting hotter”, a strong spirit, a natural spiritual intimacy, eliciting strong reactions even discomfort from most, living apart from the world and yet an equally deep sense that you must come out of the crucible to contribute what has been distilled in this long forging that has been your life. Moon in Cancer conjunct the Ascendant conjunct Saturn in Cancer is your emotionally and physically abusive, cold mother. It is wise to know that you can and must leave home when you have both Pluto and Uranus in your 4th house of home if you are to fulfill your life purpose. Your Dad described by your Sun/Neptune/Venus conjunction offers a caring presence while your brother described by Mercury conjunct Mars and Neptune offered a fellow soldier who then drifted off as Neptune can do when the Mars battle of childhood was done. Half of your chart is in your 5th house confirming that you are an artist who does have an “authentic story” to tell in your music and writing, art born of your spiritual intimacy with life and your own Moon in the 1st house life story. As the late, great Maya Angelou did, you can write about your life, about life, so personally and trans-personally that it will truly be your story and our story. Time to come out now that your progressed Sun has moved above the horizon into your 7th house and since transiting Uranus has moved into your 10th house of career over the last 2 years. While Saturn rising quincunx your Venus clearly validates your experience of debilitating stage fright and your fears of failure and exposure, the vessel you have become through the purifying heat is the woman who can surrender her fears to the service of her creative gift/work. It seems likely that when your progressed Moon enters your 7th house of partnership conjuncting your progressed Sun there in 8-9 months that you will be ready to enter the world in this new phase, will find those who can help you facilitate that reentry and that you may also find a personal partner if you want one. Of course, you feel restless, anxious and unprepared for the future with transiting Uranus upsetting your careful balance as it trines your natal Venus (creative brilliance) and squares your natal Saturn both breaking down your fears and insisting you move on despite the lingering threads of fear. Jupiter’s conjunction to your Ascendant just began a new 12 year chapter of your life when opportunities await inside and outside. Artists often create some of their most important work when Saturn transits their 5th house which is where you are being supported now and for another few years. It’s time, you are ready!
Ask the Oracle – July 26, 2014
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