I was born April 22, 1955. I have enjoyed using astrology as a tool for transformation and came upon your site when I was trying to figure our more information about my second Saturn return. I’m an educated amateur in this field. I am unclear as to when my Saturn return will be over, feeling as if I’m right in the middle of it. I’m thinking I’ve got until the end of the year with this (it feels like there is a black cloud over me) and I would just like your input. There seem to be lots of opinions about when it’s “over” or at least when the deepest recognitions come. My last Saturn return brought me the ending of a deep involvement with a spiritual group which turned out to be the best thing for me, ever. I began a business soon after, had some years of success and fun, but it seems that I never learned self love and I’m really having a hard time looking at any past “success” now with any seriousness. I carry a lot of financial debt from my business but I can also say that I am very blessed to have a wonderful partner in my life. I’m grateful for a lot in my life. I am not new to anything alternative but feel like even though I know what’s “right”or good for me (and I do it much of the time), I feel sad, lost and as though the goddess herself has given up on me. I feel like a lost cause. Nothing I do seems to make a big difference. I’ve started doing EFT, which has helped, and I am in pretty good health (all that tofu over these 30 years, I guess)…I remind myself to be grateful and I am, as that feeling helps me get “through it”. Do you have any words of encouragement for me now and is there a point in the near future when this aspect truly lessens? I know this sounds dramatic but I feel like I need help. I feel like I’m dying here without a lifeboat. Thanks and many blessings. (CU)
You are correct. Your Saturn return will not be complete until September of this year when transiting Saturn completes its passage over 19 degrees of Scorpio, your Saturn degree. The timing of a full integration, a full recognition of your Saturn lesson is dependent on your natal Saturn, what you choose and do during your life and at your Saturn return and other astrological indicators in your natal chart as well as your current transits/progressions. It is very helpful to review one’s life and previous Saturn return during this second Saturn time – your previous Saturn return was successful and beneficial indicating that this one should be as well but you are now face to face (as we all are as we approach 60 years) with your inner world, whatever was left undone in your past. Fortunately, you are healthy, supported by a wonderful partner, grateful for all you do have, and are working with EFT healing. Congratulations on all you have accomplished. Saturn times are ones when we need to congratulate ourselves as much as we need to face our shadow. Your Saturn return is complicated, described by your natal Saturn squaring Pluto surfacing a deeper, karmic (if you believe in karma) despair resulting in your feeling sad, lost, deserted by the Goddess herself. Born with Neptune rising, your natural sensitivity feels, has felt and will always feel much more than the ordinary leaving you carrying pain that is yours and not yours. This is the time to delve deeply into your natal Saturn in Scorpio, Saturn square Pluto and Venus quincunx Neptune in order to heal and to enjoy your emotional, spiritual sensitivity, vision, and wisdom. A grand trine in water signs is a beautiful gift leading you to emotional healing, to emotional contentment which you will then be able to share with others leading to your fulfillment in this next chapter of your life.
I am writing to you because I do not know where to turn. I have been dealing with this for many years. I am trying to understand my gift and calling. I often see spirits, hear them – angels, fairies, things in my dreams. I have seen these things since I was a child but I have a blockage I don’t understand. I have seen other readers, tellers who often tell me my gift is more powerful than theirs. How is that possible if I don’t know what it is? I have gone to churches where pastors will stare at me. I can tell if they are fake or not; one told me there were angels all around me. I knew what he was talking about though my husband thought he was crazy. I am going to Christian clinical counseling to help as many people as I can. I did have a rough childhood which could be the reason for my blockage. Right now I am going through a little financial hardship but I have faith. I am confused about whether God wants me on this path; if so, why isn’t it clear? I was born May 8, 1974 on Mother’s Day. (TT)
Spiritual vision and clear insight are certainly visible in your chart; your Moon conjunct Neptune is an indicator of your spiritual vision and sensitivity which often manifests as seeing the “unseen” as you do when you see angels and fairies while your natal Venus opposite Pluto describes both your clarity and depth of insight as you described noting that you can tell if the pastors are fake or not and it describes your “rough” childhood. The importance of your Venus/Pluto is indicated by your Venus position in your 8th house and the fact that Venus rules your Taurus Sun which is quincunx Uranus and your Moon. Depth of insight and depth of pain are often experienced side by side as pain opens us insight, compassion and knowing. Absolutely, your childhood suffering does and should create a blockage for you in order to protect you until your foundation is strong and grounded. It is necessary to first devote yourself to your own healing work which is now urgent as transiting Pluto is opposite your natal Mars which rules your natal Pluto – the message is to do the deep work required to heal your past in order to be fully of service as you wish to be. The old adage “healer, heal thyself” is true. Sun quincunx Uranus, Moon conjunct Neptune, Venus opposite Pluto and Mars conjunct Saturn all point to the trauma which underlies the blockage you experience. Healing this past will release your blockage resulting in your ability to hear the guidance you seek for your life purpose. These recent years have been difficult due to transiting Uranus and Pluto aspecting your natal Venus/Pluto/Saturn and Mars, which is not quite complete for another year. Take this time to focus on you, to enjoy your marriage and life, trusting that the time for your work in the world to begin is a few years in the future when your progressed Venus reaches your Mercury, you reach a progressed New Moon, and Uranus solar arcs over your natal Neptune.
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