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Ask the Oracle – September 15, 2012

By Julia Bondi

I haven’t been in an intimate relationship since 1993. I have taken the last 19 years to focus on inner healing and spirituality. My birthday is April 2, 1958. I think I am a double Aries and Virgo. I’ve been married 3 times but none of the marriages lasted very long, under 2 years. I was so moved by your response to E C’s question that I’m hoping you might have some insights to share with me regarding this time in my life to find love, romance and marriage. Is it a good time? I would love to be in a loving, harmonious and deeply fulfilling intimate relationship. (LB)

It is so interesting to notice how likely a natal Saturn in the 7th house of partners describes a later marriage being the happy, successful relationship of a lifetime. You do have Jupiter ruling your Sagittarian 7th house, meaning that you will always have the opportunity to find a partner who will want to be with you; already clearly operative with three past marriages. You are an Aries Sun with a Virgo Moon and Gemini rising. It is common for someone with Gemini rising to move from one relationship to another as they learn from each getting to know what they really want and need in a partner. You have wisely taken time to mature, develop your spirituality and take responsibility for your own healing which makes it now possible to be a conscious partner at which point you can attract a conscious partner.

In 2 ½ years transiting Saturn will enter your 7th house, which is likely to mean a marriage for you. Your current serious inquiry into your relationship future, as well as recognition that you do want a partner and can describe what you want in a relationship, are signaled by transiting Saturn conjunct your natal Jupiter for the last nine months. You are ready! Now it is just a matter of when. Transiting Jupiter will trine your natal Jupiter next spring, your solar arc Jupiter will conjunct your natal Saturn in your 7th house in three years, your solar arc Mercury (Mercury rules your 5th house of romance) will conjunct your natal Saturn in the 7th in two years. I feel very confident that you will be married again in two to four years. Your progressed Moon (emotional needs, awareness and readiness) is now in your 5th house of romance and will be for the next 2 ½ years which is exciting. A romance may even begin next spring as your progressed Moon squares your 7th house Saturn at the same time transiting Jupiter conjuncts it. All that you have done will pay off now that you know yourself, know what you want and are at the time in your life that is attuned to your life plan!

I was born on August 2, 1965. I am 47 years old and wonder why it is so hard for me to make GOOD friends. I either attract ones that become critical of me or they are LIARS. Will this pattern ever change? I am happily married to the most wonderful man in the world (12/10/63) who is an angel. My daughter is also a true blessing. Please help me figure this out. I am to the point of thinking that I am better off without any female friends in my life other than my sister…HELP. (LS)

Often we don’t realize that sibling relationships are found in your 3rd house, child relationships are found in the 5th house, spousal relationships are found in the 7th house ,while friends are found in the 11th house. Each of these relationships is genuinely different, with success in one arena not necessarily any guarantee of success in the others. For you, your husband is described by your Jupiter/Neptune as the co-rulers of your Pisces 7th house. These two rulers are quincunx to one another which does require adjustments for both of you but can and does work well for you due to Jupiter’s trine to your Moon/Mars (emotions, needs and sensuality) while your Neptune is trine your Saturn (longevity and loyalty). Your daughter is described by your Saturn, the ruler of your Capricorn 5th house, which is trine (very positive with a natural and achievable ease) Neptune suggesting that your daughter is not only a Neptunian, spiritual blessing but there is a soul bond between the two of you. Your sister is described by your Mars/Pluto, the rulers of your Scorpio 3rd house. Mars is conjunct your Moon trine Jupiter, while Pluto is in your 12th house conjunct your Venus/Uranus opposite Saturn. Notice that each of these relationships is described by a trine, Neptune contact, 12th house position and or a Saturn contact emphasizing soulful connection, loyalty and the positive qualities you experience in these relationships.

Of course, there are other aspects and complexities to these planets, but positive ones dominate and are available to build these caring relationships that bless you. Your friends are described by your Moon, the ruler of your Cancer 11th house. Your Moon is conjunct your Mars trine Jupiter which says to me that you can find friends who will be close, dynamic and encouraging as you share personal, active, adventurous and fun experiences. However, you do have your Leo Sun in your 11th house squaring your natal Neptune, suggesting that you may have unrealistic expectations of friends, get involved too quickly without assessing if these people are sincere and grounded, and may be letting them pick you rather than you taking more responsibility and care in the selection. The dishonesty or deception (lying) is not uncommon with a square (conflict aspect) from Neptune. Note that your Sun does not trine or sextile any other planets, which is why this has not been easy for you. It is important to approach this area of your life from the Moon in Libra since you as a Sun in Leo and Moon in Libra do want and would benefit from and enjoy female or male friends. It is also important to take a close look at all of your Virgo planets in the 12th house (Mercury, Venus, Uranus, and Pluto) as well as Virgo rising. Virgo Virgo can be too critical of oneself or others which you may be projecting toward friends due to their 12th house position. As transiting Saturn moves into Scorpio in October and begins to square your Sun in the 11th house, you can begin to meet new friends taking your time to get to know them before you become too close. Don’t give up!

Filed under: Ask the Oracle

About Julia Bondi

Julia Bondi began her study of Astrology and Metaphysics in 1973. Julia has been an accomplished counseling astrologer, intuitive, teacher and writer for more
than 30 years. With degrees in clinical psychology and esoteric philosophy Julia brings insight, clarity and caring to her work. As a seeker, intuitive and teacher Julia draws her wisdom and dedication to spirituality from her moon rising on her ascendant, her 12th house stellium in Gemini and her Pisces midheaven. Julia can be contacted by email.

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m  Conjunction:  Like peas in a pod, planets in conjunction tend to come from the same place. They act together, but it’s also hard to tell them apart. This aspect can increase talent, focus, and intensity (“two are better than one”). Or one planet can disappear as the other dominates. Their connection feels so natural, it’s easy to think everyone blends these planetary energies just as you do—but mostly, they don’t!.

p  Sextile:  Planets in sextile are compatible, though without any fireworks. This aspect doesn’t demand your attention. It quietly presents an opportunity. You can join these archetypal forces. Donna Cunningham has called this the “Oh, that!” aspect, because that’s generally what her clients say when she describes their benefits.  To get the most from sextiles you need to actively work them.

q  Square:  Squares are wild and wonderful—but difficult too. The power struggle between these planets was likely defined in your youth, when they were impossibly challenging. People are usually aware of their squares. They force the issues that make you to grow. And that’s their gift. They ensure you learn your lessons. When you rise to the occasion, they bless you with energy, action, and success.

r  Trine:  Michael Munkasey has dubbed this the “goddess aspect” because it’s so lovely. Identifying talents you may have perfected in a previous life, trines can bring you joy. There’s a nice flow of energy between planets in trine. They support and reinforce each another. But without any struggle, you might take them for granted—neither using nor developing their gifts. An unattended trine can sometimes trick you into negative behaviors.

t  Inconjunct/Quincunx:  Your quincunx planets are innately incompatible. Bringing them into harmonious expression requires constant adjustments. This can be stressful, also motivating. You’ve got to keep changing your process, opinions or attitude—which promotes highly creative solutions.

u  Opposition:  They say opposites attract—and planets in opposition are never far from each other, though they’re constantly bickering. You may be triggered into awareness of this aspect by other people who seem to resist or undermine you.  An opposition can make you feel uncertain, insecure, or discontent, until you can accept and see yourself in both energies. Typically people find it easier to identify with one side and project the other onto unsuspecting others in the outer world.

First House: Personality, physical body, beginnings. Includes the Ascendant and rules physical appearance, the image you project to others, your general outlook on life, how you start things; may describe your role in your family system, often guides your first impression of immediate environment.

Second House: Money and personal finances, sense of self-worth and basic values, personal possessions, talents.

Third House: Communication, thoughts, language skills like writing and speaking, early schooling, siblings and neighbors, short trips, coming and going around town.

Fourth House: Your home, psychological foundations and roots, family, parents, domestic life, instinctive behavior, ancestry, your connection with the past, sense of security, domestic life, real estate. conditions at the end of life.

Fifth House: Children, creativity, romance; pleasure, entertainment, self-expression; all forms of “play”, speculation, gambling, and attitude towards taking risks; hobbies, attitude towards romance, lovers as opposed to partners, attitude towards having fun.

Sixth House: Work and job (as opposed to career), daily life, attitude towards service and coworkers, helpfulness, pets, attitude towards routine and organization, how you refine and perfect your skills.

Seventh House: Partnerships, one-to-one relationships, marriage, the first marriage, the “significant other”, business partnerships, competitors, open enemies, lawyers, mediators, counselors, contracts, negotiations, agreements. clients/the public.

Eighth House: Transformations and crisis, your ability to meet and rebound from crisis and change, sexuality; sex, death and rebirth, rituals and personal growth, your partner’s resources, addictions, psychology, other people’s money, taxes, divorce/alimony, inheritance.

Ninth House: Attitude toward expanding horizons, religious beliefs and personal philosophy, higher education, long-distance travel, morals, foreign languages and cultures, personal truths, publishing, commerce, advertising, your sense of adventure.

Tenth House: Career and profession, your contribution to society, social status, public reputation, material success, how you carve out a public identity for yourself; attitude toward authority figures, parents, caregivers, bosses, governments, attitude towards responsibility, desire for achievement.

Eleventh House: Friends, groups, organizations; hopes, wishes, aspirations, personal goals; your philanthropic attitude, concern for the collective, humanity; like tenth, can bring recognition and honors for fulfilling hopes and dreams.

Twelfth House: What’s hidden beneath the surface, karmic dustbin, limiting childhood/past-life messages, self-undoing, hidden enemies, hidden weaknesses, dreams, secret affairs, lost items, hospitals and prisons, hidden strengths, spiritual studies and soul growth.

A  Sun: Our vitality and magnetism; self-identity, ego.
Roles: The Self, the Hero, the Performer, the King.

B  Moon: Intuition, emotion, nurture.
Roles: The Mother, the High Priestess, the Child.

C  Mercury: Mind; physical dexterity and mental agility.
Roles: The Thinker, the Communicator, the Student, the Trickster, the Merchant, the Thief.

D  Venus: Our capacity for pleasure, receptivity, creativity, and social connection. Also indicates our relationships, self esteem, and financial abundance.
Roles: The Lover, the Seductress, the Artist.

E  Mars: Desire, initiative, anger.
Roles: The Protector, the Athlete, the Warrior.

F  Jupiter: Luck, opportunity, expansion, higher learning, religion.
Roles: The Scholar, the Gypsy, the Traveler, the Monk, the Professor.

G  Saturn: Hard work, commitment, focus, inadequacy, leadership, suffering, loss.
Roles: The Task Master, the Grim Reaper, the Wise Old Man, the Builder, the Cynic, the Boss.

H  Uranus: Change, breakthroughs, upsets, discoveries.
Roles: The Revolutionary, the Humanitarian, the Visionary, the Snob.

I  Neptune: Imagination, spirituality, idealism, addictions, deception, compassion.
Roles: The Artist, the Romantic, the Guru, the Addict, the Martyr, the Victim.

J  Pluto: Transformation, power, psychological dynamics, helplessness.
Roles: The Terrorist, the Detective, the Psychotherapist, the Dictator, shady people.

a  Aries: Pioneering, competitive, selfish, impatient, courageous, reckless, independent, dynamic, domineering, “Me first!”

b  Taurus: Patient, stable, lazy, dependable, practical, sensual, stubborn, artistic, possessive, greedy, gentle, loyal.

c  Gemini: Intelligent, curious, adaptable, quick-witted, restless, clever, scatterbrained, lacking follow-through.

d  Cancer: Nourishing, intuitive, protective, moody, sensitive, maternal, domestic, childish, cautious, creative.

e  Leo: Proud, dignified, vain, expressive, romantic, generous, childish, overbearing, self-assured, creative.

f  Virgo: Perfection-seeking, practical, methodical, petty, critical, studious, discriminating, cautious, never satisfied.

g  Libra: Charming, sociable, peace-loving, refined, diplomatic, artistic, indecisive, apathetic, easily deterred.

h  Scorpio: Passionate, secretive, penetrating, resourceful, suspicious, manipulative, jealous, sarcastic, intolerant, determined, aware.

i  Sagittarius: Freedom-loving, philosophical, optimistic, enthusiastic, careless, impatient, talkative, a know-it-all, broadminded, athletic, honest.

j  Capricorn: Serious, responsible, practical, hardworking, stubborn, brooding, inhibited, status-conscious, domineering, unforgiving.

k  Aquarius: Progressive, individualistic, unpredictable, cold, intellectual, artistic, eccentric, shy, impersonal, scientific.

l  Pisces: Compassionate, intuitive, ungrounded, romantic, impractical, self-sacrificing, seductive, musical, artistic.