One afternoon last week while driving down a peaceful boulevard in my neighborhood, I passed a slow-moving car. To my shock, the driver sped up and began aggressively tailgating me – all the way to my house! As I got out of my car, the red-faced woman screamed at me, calling me a danger to the neighborhood. I am a good driver. Clearly, she was having a bad day. But did I sympathize with her? Hell no! As she ranted on, I told her to shut up and let it go – while slamming the gate behind me.
The incident rankled for days. I almost never get into altercations like that! It was not my finest moment, to be sure. Then I happened upon an article called “Loving Ourselves Unconditionally” in the February Science of Mind Magazine. In it, Molly Kate Brown observes that the fever pitch of discord that’s currently happening around us is akin to the tantrum of a three-year old who wants to destroy everything in sight. “She needs the unconditional, loving hug of Grandmother,” says Brown. “No amount of shaming or blaming will calm her; however, the loving embrace of Grandmother can.”
Our culture’s searing divisiveness, she adds, perpetuates an inner discord which has been building for generations. Brown recommends that we put on a “suit of unconditional love” that can hold all parts of ourselves and others without judgment, the way a loving grandmother would. Only that kind of embrace, she insists, can stop the madness and bring us greater peace – since it allows us to be with our inner pain and shed the tears our ancestors could not.
The upcoming Leo Full Moon (Feb. 8, 11:33 p.m. PST) offers a potent opportunity in which to practice self-love. Fiery Leo rules the heart, seat of compassion and courage (derived from coeur, the French word for heart). Emotions run high around any Full Moon, even when cool-headed Aquarius is involved. As the Aquarius Sun sextiles fiery Mars in spirited Sagittarius while the Leo Moon trines Mars, we receive the energy, motivation and courage to open our hearts to ourselves and others – even while avoiding or transforming any reactivity. The objective is to balance head with heart.
We recently experienced one such incident just as Mercury entered its shadow phase and began slowing down prior to its Feb. 16 retrograde. The communication planet dipped its toe into the murky waters of Pisces on Feb. 3, and the next day brought great confusion at the Iowa caucus. Logical Mercury is in both detriment and fall in the emotional sign of Pisces, where it will remain for ten weeks. During this time, we may struggle to balance logic with feelings. It may be necessary to go on faith, without the rational answers we seek. Yet this cycle can also enhance our right brain feminine consciousness and intuition, as it takes us within to feel deeply as we sort out the past. Still, there are bound to be more confounding incidents ahead.
What to do? In my case, I’m leaving shame and blame behind, and sending a big virtual hug to that agitated driver – as well as myself. Do you know someone who could use an unconditionally loving embrace? How about you? We can all make good use of the heart-opening energies of Saturday’s Leo Full Moon. So don your suit of unconditional love and give yourself and others a big embrace. You’ll make Grandma proud.
So helpful.
I was just this minute “having a good cry” and feeling again like the infant my mother left crying in the crib. “Let them cry it out.” She always said about babies. I still feel that nobody hears and nobody is coming to get me. Learning to self-soothe is a major theme in my life.
What a cruel belief that was about leaving babies alone to cry it out. So sorry you had to suffer that, even now. But at least you are aware of it, and taking steps to soothe yourself. Sending you a big grandma hug!