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Virgo Full Moon: Good Enough

By Jessica Shepherd

Most of us are born into lives with teachers (also known as parents) who are really good at imparting lessons we most need to learn. My mother was a Virgo with a tenth house Sun. With a placement like that you would’ve thought she’d be running an organization, or heading up a service non-profit. The tenth house is the house of “calling,” contribution on a large scale; tenth house planets have big ambitions… and planets here need a high level of development to step into such big shoes.

My mom did spend a period working with the developmentally disabled, but ultimately she did not have an easy time finding her calling in the world and eventually succumbed to a mysterious debilitating condition I can only call a failure to thrive. The exacting standards you’d expect of a Virgo Sun turned into paralyzing procrastination. Odd jobs would be drummed up, kids picked up from school and bills would get paid -when she got around to it. I now believe she was a closeted perfectionist who had set such impossibly high standards for her life that at a certain point, in her case a fatal tipping point, the mountain of infinite potentialities imploded into inaction. Focusing on the inadequacies around her, where situations and people fell short, she refused to critically address the details of what it takes to build a functional life. By the time she died, her life, her choices, no longer made sense to those who loved her.

I’ve been arm-wrestling lately with the demon of not being good enough. I’ve created this life, this career, and this person named Jessica Shepherd looks really convincing. But sometimes it feels like an act, a farce. Sometimes the fear, of not hitting all the right notes in a chart reading, of not delivering my very personal best, of not measuring up to my teachers -and all the many talented astrologers out there who have said everything there is to say, and often better than I have, overwhelms me.

Those are not my better days. They create writer’s block. They have me feeling inordinately nervous before a presentation. I want to pull my turtle head under my turtle shell and call the whole thing off. These thoughts work against the very principle that has, over time, earned me a place at the table, that feeling of allowing passion, curiosity and excitement to lead me where it may. Knowing I was not ready, but also that I’d never be truly ready or confident or secure enough. I trusted that the desire and impulse to follow what called my name was holy, and that if I weren’t meant to be at said table I would be tapped on the shoulder and quietly asked to leave. Until that moment, I decided back then, I would keep moving ahead.

I suppose, in a backwards way, my mother taught me the shadow of perfectionism. I learned, early on, that the day of feeling “good enough” may indeed never come… and that “waiting” could be a way of opting out of life with it’s complexity, overwhelm, insecurity and messiness.

Perfectionism can be debilitating, paralyzing. Getting it right, says Julia Cameron, Fixing it before I go any further. You may call it having standards. What you should be calling it is perfectionism… Perfectionism refuses to move forward. Like waiting until we’re assured of success or financial security before pursuing our dreams, perfectionism, accepting nothing less than excellence, gets us nowhere fast.

This Virgo Full Moon asks: Is your desire for a guarantee, your fear of not being good enough, your “high standards”-your perfectionism- holding you back from taking action in your life? Chiron joins the Pisces Sun, near Neptune, circulating feelings of inadequacy, chaos, overwhelm, and potentially the feeling that we are cut off from Spirit, we are alone. Chiron is aligned with the negative stories we tell our self, about our self, that our life is particularly unfair, that other people’s lives are better, stories that perpetuate our own suffering. Watch out for those stories right now.

These are not easy days. The Uranus-Pluto square is exact on my Moon, creating emotional unrest; for every hydra I slay, three more grow in its place. For all, the square is forcing us to look into our shadow, to heal our wounds to claim freedom. It’s a big, sometimes God-awful, job. As with any battle where personal liberty is at stake (Uranus in Aries), some soldiers will fall. At this Full Moon, to curb potential overwhelm and subsequent passivity, I suggest steeping in the simple wisdom of Virgo’s work ethic: Take one small step, then another. Cross two things off on your to-do list, today. If you feel you’re treading water, imagine all the canvases Van Gogh cut his teeth on before Sunflowers (try Google-ing “bad art by great artists” -you will feel better). Show up. Do what you do… until a consensus tells you to stop. And take comfort: Whether working on our self, an astrology reading or writing a book, the work of our life is never complete, or perfect. We just get better at learning to let it go.

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About Jessica Shepherd

Jessica Shepherd is a writer, astrologer and health coach who has studied and practiced modern astrology since 1992. She is the author of A Love Alchemist’s Notebook: Magical Secrets For Drawing Your True Love Into Your Life (Llewellyn, 2010) and the books Venus Signs: Discover Your Erotic Gifts and Secret Desires Through Astrology
(Llewellyn, 2015) and Karmic Dates and Momentary Mates: The Astrology of the Fifth House (Moonkissd, 2014). In 2018, after living in California for twenty years, she relocated to Honolulu, Hawaii with her husband, dog, and cat. Find out more about Jessica at Moonkissd (www.moonkissd.com).

Comments

  1. Jessica Shepherd says

    Mar 8, 2015 at 11:15 am

    Great awareness, Philippa. You are so welcome 🙂 xo, Jessica

    Reply
  2. Philippa says

    Mar 8, 2015 at 7:24 am

    The part about never being truly ready and wanting to hide under the blankets really resonated with me. I have opted out of life in so many ways! I am 62 now and have finally woken up to the fact that I need to make something of my life – my own life – mostly I have pleased others to make sure I was really there. Thank you so much for your truly manageable work ethic.

    Reply
  3. Charlene Boydston says

    Mar 5, 2015 at 1:21 pm

    Thank you so much for this article. It is the inspiration I needed to restart my life again!

    Reply
    • Jessica Shepherd says

      Mar 8, 2015 at 11:12 am

      Wowwie, Charlene! So glad to help you kick into gear and into life again! -Jessica

      Reply
  4. Kelly Salasin says

    Mar 5, 2015 at 5:15 am

    Lovely writing, with a broad perspective, particularly appreciated when sharing something about someone so close, as a mother. Composting and harvesting come to mind. Well done.

    Reply
    • Jessica Shepherd says

      Mar 8, 2015 at 11:11 am

      Thank you, Kelly! Love the image.- Jessica

      Reply
  5. Melissa Myers says

    Mar 5, 2015 at 5:00 am

    Loved this Jessica, really hit home and my heart, I can reeeallly relate to your experience with perfectionism and the insecurity it generates. I have a wonderful friend who recently began working for Medics without Borders and in the interview when asked about her positive qualities told them that one of them was NOT being a perfectionist, ha!…also the part about your Mom helped me to gain import insight and clarity regarding a very dear close Virgo friend.

    Thank you!
    Namaste

    Reply
    • Jessica Shepherd says

      Mar 8, 2015 at 11:11 am

      So true, Melissa. In a twist, I have a similar story about a job interview, newly out of college. Though the question was what are your weaknesses? I replied: perfectionism. On hindsight, how sad! That was a reflection of my thinking at the time: that the world only values us for what we can contribute to the GDP. Let’s change that.
      xo, Jessica

      Reply
  6. Blaine says

    Mar 4, 2015 at 8:38 pm

    I love everything you have said so beautifully! One step at a time is so true!!

    Reply
    • Jessica Shepherd says

      Mar 8, 2015 at 11:07 am

      Thanks, Blaine!

      Reply
  7. Michelle says

    Mar 4, 2015 at 3:27 am

    Thank you for this. You have saved me from myself today. Your work helps people like me looking for a crumb of understanding, a sign pointing to peace of mind.

    XO

    Reply
    • Jessica Shepherd says

      Mar 8, 2015 at 11:07 am

      Thank YOU for this, Michelle. Peace to you. xo, Jessica

      Reply
  8. Christine Miller says

    Mar 4, 2015 at 12:46 am

    Thank you, Jessica. This column’s message is spot-on for me. Coming off a 6 month travel assignment to work at home, just feeling overwhelmed & wanting to pull the covers over my head & not deal – not start anything new & boring right now. My mother, the Virgo, would say exactly your words ” Do what you do, one foot in front of the other, get on with it, don’t procrastinate, go out there”

    Reply
    • Jessica Shepherd says

      Mar 8, 2015 at 11:06 am

      Christine, I channeled your sweet mom’s wisdom, how nice! Thanks for joining in the chorus here. xo, Jessica

      Reply
  9. Jeannine Seymour says

    Mar 3, 2015 at 9:10 pm

    Jessica, I want to wrap my arms around you and call you SISTER! This article spoke to me personally, even though it was written for the general public on a fairly universal human condition. Well, maybe not universal, but certainly familiar … lots of people cannot discern quality at all, much less perfection from imperfection, and they’re some of the happiest people I know. I’m not one of them. Your honest reflection on the subject has hit home in profound way.

    Perfectionist judgment has been my nemesis for as long as I can remember (and its evil shadow, the “If It’s Not The Best Thing Ever Done, Don’t Do It At All” syndrome). Every time I go to accomplish one of my dreams, five emergency life situations intervene–each so brilliantly disguised as originating from elsewhere, outside myself, that most anyone could be convinced that I’m the victim and not the perp, but I know better.

    Deep down, i know my internal perfectionist tyrant is the creator of those interferences. Somehow, reading your analysis and evaluation of the condition puts it in a perspective that allows me to wiggle out of the box and look at it whole for the first time. Such a recognition may not bring instant redemption, but it certainly does create potential for healing where none existed before. Thank you. Really, thank you! I take your insight to heart and shower you with deep, sincere appreciation for sharing it with us.

    Reply
    • Jessica Shepherd says

      Mar 8, 2015 at 11:04 am

      Sisters in spirit, Jeannine! “Five emergency situations…” Wow. I, and know other readers, can relate. xo Jessica

      Reply

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The Moon is in its
Full Phase

in the
Sign of Scorpio


Today's Lunar Aspects (Greenwich Mean Time)
(subtract: PST -8 hours, PDT -7 hours, EST -5 hours, EDT -4 hours)

  • Moon opposite Uranus, 2:35am  May 13 2025
  • Moon trine Saturn, 6:37am  May 13 2025
  • Moon trine Neptune, 11:29am  May 13 2025
  • Moon sextile Pluto, 4:11pm  May 13 2025

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Astrologers use a variety of house systems, or methods of dividing up the sky into twelve sections. I use the Porphyry house system; another popular house system is Placidus (this is the default on https://astro.com). If the chart I send you looks different from what you are used to seeing, then likely a system other than Porphyry was used. Whole signs, Equal House, Regiomantus, and Campanus are examples of other systems. If you find all of this confusing, do not worry. It is likely not critical to your report.

m  Conjunction:  Like peas in a pod, planets in conjunction tend to come from the same place. They act together, but it’s also hard to tell them apart. This aspect can increase talent, focus, and intensity (“two are better than one”). Or one planet can disappear as the other dominates. Their connection feels so natural, it’s easy to think everyone blends these planetary energies just as you do—but mostly, they don’t!.

p  Sextile:  Planets in sextile are compatible, though without any fireworks. This aspect doesn’t demand your attention. It quietly presents an opportunity. You can join these archetypal forces. Donna Cunningham has called this the “Oh, that!” aspect, because that’s generally what her clients say when she describes their benefits.  To get the most from sextiles you need to actively work them.

q  Square:  Squares are wild and wonderful—but difficult too. The power struggle between these planets was likely defined in your youth, when they were impossibly challenging. People are usually aware of their squares. They force the issues that make you to grow. And that’s their gift. They ensure you learn your lessons. When you rise to the occasion, they bless you with energy, action, and success.

r  Trine:  Michael Munkasey has dubbed this the “goddess aspect” because it’s so lovely. Identifying talents you may have perfected in a previous life, trines can bring you joy. There’s a nice flow of energy between planets in trine. They support and reinforce each another. But without any struggle, you might take them for granted—neither using nor developing their gifts. An unattended trine can sometimes trick you into negative behaviors.

t  Inconjunct/Quincunx:  Your quincunx planets are innately incompatible. Bringing them into harmonious expression requires constant adjustments. This can be stressful, also motivating. You’ve got to keep changing your process, opinions or attitude—which promotes highly creative solutions.

u  Opposition:  They say opposites attract—and planets in opposition are never far from each other, though they’re constantly bickering. You may be triggered into awareness of this aspect by other people who seem to resist or undermine you.  An opposition can make you feel uncertain, insecure, or discontent, until you can accept and see yourself in both energies. Typically people find it easier to identify with one side and project the other onto unsuspecting others in the outer world.

First House: Personality, physical body, beginnings. Includes the Ascendant and rules physical appearance, the image you project to others, your general outlook on life, how you start things; may describe your role in your family system, often guides your first impression of immediate environment.

Second House: Money and personal finances, sense of self-worth and basic values, personal possessions, talents.

Third House: Communication, thoughts, language skills like writing and speaking, early schooling, siblings and neighbors, short trips, coming and going around town.

Fourth House: Your home, psychological foundations and roots, family, parents, domestic life, instinctive behavior, ancestry, your connection with the past, sense of security, domestic life, real estate. conditions at the end of life.

Fifth House: Children, creativity, romance; pleasure, entertainment, self-expression; all forms of “play”, speculation, gambling, and attitude towards taking risks; hobbies, attitude towards romance, lovers as opposed to partners, attitude towards having fun.

Sixth House: Work and job (as opposed to career), daily life, attitude towards service and coworkers, helpfulness, pets, attitude towards routine and organization, how you refine and perfect your skills.

Seventh House: Partnerships, one-to-one relationships, marriage, the first marriage, the “significant other”, business partnerships, competitors, open enemies, lawyers, mediators, counselors, contracts, negotiations, agreements. clients/the public.

Eighth House: Transformations and crisis, your ability to meet and rebound from crisis and change, sexuality; sex, death and rebirth, rituals and personal growth, your partner’s resources, addictions, psychology, other people’s money, taxes, divorce/alimony, inheritance.

Ninth House: Attitude toward expanding horizons, religious beliefs and personal philosophy, higher education, long-distance travel, morals, foreign languages and cultures, personal truths, publishing, commerce, advertising, your sense of adventure.

Tenth House: Career and profession, your contribution to society, social status, public reputation, material success, how you carve out a public identity for yourself; attitude toward authority figures, parents, caregivers, bosses, governments, attitude towards responsibility, desire for achievement.

Eleventh House: Friends, groups, organizations; hopes, wishes, aspirations, personal goals; your philanthropic attitude, concern for the collective, humanity; like tenth, can bring recognition and honors for fulfilling hopes and dreams.

Twelfth House: What’s hidden beneath the surface, karmic dustbin, limiting childhood/past-life messages, self-undoing, hidden enemies, hidden weaknesses, dreams, secret affairs, lost items, hospitals and prisons, hidden strengths, spiritual studies and soul growth.

A  Sun: Our vitality and magnetism; self-identity, ego.
Roles: The Self, the Hero, the Performer, the King.

B  Moon: Intuition, emotion, nurture.
Roles: The Mother, the High Priestess, the Child.

C  Mercury: Mind; physical dexterity and mental agility.
Roles: The Thinker, the Communicator, the Student, the Trickster, the Merchant, the Thief.

D  Venus: Our capacity for pleasure, receptivity, creativity, and social connection. Also indicates our relationships, self esteem, and financial abundance.
Roles: The Lover, the Seductress, the Artist.

E  Mars: Desire, initiative, anger.
Roles: The Protector, the Athlete, the Warrior.

F  Jupiter: Luck, opportunity, expansion, higher learning, religion.
Roles: The Scholar, the Gypsy, the Traveler, the Monk, the Professor.

G  Saturn: Hard work, commitment, focus, inadequacy, leadership, suffering, loss.
Roles: The Task Master, the Grim Reaper, the Wise Old Man, the Builder, the Cynic, the Boss.

H  Uranus: Change, breakthroughs, upsets, discoveries.
Roles: The Revolutionary, the Humanitarian, the Visionary, the Snob.

I  Neptune: Imagination, spirituality, idealism, addictions, deception, compassion.
Roles: The Artist, the Romantic, the Guru, the Addict, the Martyr, the Victim.

J  Pluto: Transformation, power, psychological dynamics, helplessness.
Roles: The Terrorist, the Detective, the Psychotherapist, the Dictator, shady people.

a  Aries: Pioneering, competitive, selfish, impatient, courageous, reckless, independent, dynamic, domineering, “Me first!”

b  Taurus: Patient, stable, lazy, dependable, practical, sensual, stubborn, artistic, possessive, greedy, gentle, loyal.

c  Gemini: Intelligent, curious, adaptable, quick-witted, restless, clever, scatterbrained, lacking follow-through.

d  Cancer: Nourishing, intuitive, protective, moody, sensitive, maternal, domestic, childish, cautious, creative.

e  Leo: Proud, dignified, vain, expressive, romantic, generous, childish, overbearing, self-assured, creative.

f  Virgo: Perfection-seeking, practical, methodical, petty, critical, studious, discriminating, cautious, never satisfied.

g  Libra: Charming, sociable, peace-loving, refined, diplomatic, artistic, indecisive, apathetic, easily deterred.

h  Scorpio: Passionate, secretive, penetrating, resourceful, suspicious, manipulative, jealous, sarcastic, intolerant, determined, aware.

i  Sagittarius: Freedom-loving, philosophical, optimistic, enthusiastic, careless, impatient, talkative, a know-it-all, broadminded, athletic, honest.

j  Capricorn: Serious, responsible, practical, hardworking, stubborn, brooding, inhibited, status-conscious, domineering, unforgiving.

k  Aquarius: Progressive, individualistic, unpredictable, cold, intellectual, artistic, eccentric, shy, impersonal, scientific.

l  Pisces: Compassionate, intuitive, ungrounded, romantic, impractical, self-sacrificing, seductive, musical, artistic.