Ask the Oracle – October 15, 2012

Actually your 2^nd Saturn return is nearly 2 years in the future telling you that this illness is not meant to be the end of your life. A study of your 6^th house of health, ruled by Mars, shows your natal Mars conjunct Saturn and square Pluto describing the seriousness of your stroke and heart attack. Last fall when you became ill, transiting Neptune was exactly opposite your natal Pluto and square your Mars/Saturn setting off this warning sign of your need to prioritize your health. I suspect your health challenges have both a Saturn cause which is genetic and a Mars/Pluto cause from lifestyle or diet choices which you will need to address. When we see both a natal pattern ruling the health house which you have and a serious transit or progression at the time of an acute illness which you have, then the illness must be treated. I would advise you to have the surgery as soon as you can, take the time to heal, and look at how you can live a healthier life through diet, exercise and emotional/spiritual healing. Your Mars/Saturn/Pluto in the fixed signs of Scorpio and Leo tell the story of your struggles, disappointments, and pain in this life which does require a serious focus on psychological healing in addition to medical treatment. A major move will be visible in the 9^th house which in your chart contains your natal Uranus making the stimulation and freedom of another country appealing for you. I do think you can move back to the UK when transiting Jupiter moves into your 9^th house of long distance moves in the fall of 2013 or early 2014 which would be much closer to the time of your 2^nd Saturn return. In addition to this opportune Jupiter transit for your move, by then transiting Pluto will be conjunct your natal Moon which rules your 9^th house describing the impact and importance of this move for you. This fall as transiting Saturn conjuncts your Ascendant beginning a new 30 cycle of maturation/initiation is the time to do what needs to be done for your wellbeing despite your desire to move now. Saturn calls us to face what is hard to face in order to build the foundation for our later success which can be the meaning of your 2^nd Saturn return when you are able make a genuinely healthy move as you enter the 3^rd  and most satisfying stage of your life. Blessings on your healing journey.

What I am sure about is that no one’s life is just about suffering though most lives do include suffering which is the reason there are innumerable books discussing the purpose of suffering in human lives. Certainly your chart reveals the struggle and suffering you experienced as a child – natal Moon conjunct Neptune/Saturn in the 4^th house of home and family; natal Sun conjunct Chiron in the 6^th house squaring your Moon/Saturn/Neptune opposing Uranus in the 12^th house of Spirit and quincunxing Pluto in the 1^st house of self awareness). It is understandable that your first marriage at the young age of 20 would mirror your abusive, lonely childhood as a reflection of the only world and relationship pattern you knew. Fortunately, you had the wisdom and courage to end that marriage, decide to raise your children, study spirituality and heal yourself. When you fell in love with your 2^nd husband you must have been in your late 40’s expecting that your long path to wholeness would result in a happy, healthy marriage, however, it is just as important that your partner had chosen a similar path to self awareness. If you have looked at your partner’s chart, he has a powerful stellium in Virgo composed of his natal Sun/Moon/Venus/Mars/Pluto which is a demanding life to live. His Venus, the planet of love/relationships, was retrograde at birth indicating that he brought his own losses in love into your marriage. I suspect his struggle with his own inner life was the catalyst for his cheating not his feelings about you. No, that reality does not ease your pain but it does point to the need for your partner to take responsibility for his emotional history and your responsibility to forgive him if you can. You were born with your Venus/Mars, the relationship planets, in Pisces. Your Venus is exalted in the sign of Pisces asking you to endure human suffering, both your own and that of others, in order to find the embrace of your Soul as you did in childhood leading to your genuine human freedom and healing in this life which naturally heals others. Now, the question for you is can I embrace my partner’s Soul to find forgiveness, acceptance and a rekindling of love. Your Venus/Mars conjunction opposes his Virgo planets making it very clear that you do love him, enjoy his company and can be a loving, motivating force for healing in his life. As a Capricorn Sun you are called to be an initiate in life rising to a higher understanding in your life which you sought to do as a child seeking spiritual comfort, as a young wife choosing to end an abusive marriage, as a young mother dedicating yourself to raising your children, as a divorced woman taking time for your own development and finally as a woman willing to again risk love and loss entering a 2^nd marriage. Now, the question is twofold – is your partner taking full responsibility for his own development and past behavior in order to become a true partner and are you able to trust love again despite the suffering you have experienced. Now that transiting Neptune has moved into Pisces where it is conjunct your natal Venus, this is the time to fully heal your emotional history with and through your partner if he is fully committed to this healing path.