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Pisces Full Moon Eclipse: Your Own Private Idaho

By Jessica Shepherd

I used to feel astrologically cheated out of that zany and enlightened experience known as Pisces. I’ve thought about how fun it would be to bliss out during kirtan chanting, trip the light fantastic astral traveling, communicate with Spirit beings… but my reality has been far more mundane. Pisces holds only a small footnote in my fifth house, staking a far larger claim in my sixth (also home to a Mars-Pluto opposition). The textbooks say ‘must have creativity and imagination in your work situations’. I’d surely climb the walls without that. I’ve also sacrificed my health for a nameless and faceless job that didn’t care about me, and barely lived to tell that tale.

As such, in the past, I pulled on my Pisces like you would a medical prescription – to counteract burnout and stress. Until the day that stopped working. Pisces needed to be honored, or else. I had to squarely face the fact that as long as I was out of alignment with my work-life, I would never be well. As astrologer Dana Gerhardt says of this house, “In the 6th we notice life isn’t all it’s cracked up to be. We can drown in our failure. Or we can do something about it. We can either suffer or grow.” My Mars-Pluto has the work ethic of a migrant field worker in the final days of harvest season, but with Pisces along for the ride, a thimble’s worth of consciousness is far mightier than effort and exertion. I had to grow more flow, surrender, intuition and creativity into my routines and work. I had to serve others in ways that were appropriate for me, for this body.

The Fishes ways aren’t easy to wrap one’s head around. Into the area of life Pisces falls we may struggle with a seemingly irreconcilable conundrum that ties us in knots. The current of illusion is strong, here. Always, we are faced with a choice, although at first appears with the cryptic message ‘There’s No Way Out Of This One, Buddy”. The romantic siren song of pain, separation, confusion can drown out our inherent intuitive connection to truth. Where we find Pisces (and Neptune) we are vulnerable to getting caught up in an emotional drama, to struggling with the wrong problems or asking the wrong questions. The lens of what’s real and what’s unreal, what’s yours and what’s mine, bends like taffy. Take the missive of this area too seriously – with ego, striving, a need to understand or be right- and you’ll suffer more than necessary. Some things in life are far too important to be taken seriously.

Pisces intrigues us with its promise of connection to Spirit, a soothing panacea for our human experiences of separation and alienation. We have different mediators into personal awareness of our connection to a greater consciousness–some lovely and some dark. My friend Emma has Venus, Jupiter and the South Node in the twelfth house, so I wasn’t surprised when one day she relayed her life-changing story about an ecstatic experience involving trance, dance and slipping between the veils of the world. Knowing her chart, I’d already imagined this type of experience came easy to her. Yet in comparing our experiences with the twelfth house (Pisces) we both found common ground. I have natal Pluto in my twelfth house. One night many years ago, I walked into the great dark Pacific with the intention of never coming back. Standing there, knee deep in that cold, dark water, I ran through only two scenarios: I could leave or I could stick around. Words fail to describe the magic that happened next, but somewhere in the futility and confusion and the cold dark water, I surrendered into nothingness. That humbling moment changed everything. Then an inkling of curiosity arose. I realized I really wanted to see how it all turned out. After all, what else did I have to do with my time? Suddenly, life appeared to be a game, one that I needed to take far less seriously. I had been so invested in how I wanted things to be, as if that mattered. I focused on the courage of this human life and curiosity about what would happen next. These realizations flooded my senses with calm. They made me want to laugh!

My friend had received guidance at the right moment through ecstatic dance. I had been baptized in the waters of the great Pacific. On the highway of a life that was no longer working for us, we had each reached the “last exit” sign –a greater power through surrender. Maybe I experienced the death of my ego-consciousness. As I walked back to shore, I returned with the consciousness that my life was my own, yet I was so much more. When the small “I” broke, consciousness flooded in. Returning from my water-fire baptism, I began approaching my life from the perspective that I was not alone. No one who knew me would’ve known anything had changed, but me. Brought to my knees by Pluto, I broke that invisible cycle of impossible futility by surrendering to and acknowledging a greater power within and surrounding my self. From that day forward, I knew I was connected to Spirit.

So this is what I’ve come to learn about Pisces: The areas under Pisces’ sway can be our own private Idaho or a mystical experience. Probably both. Creativity or madness? Irrational nonsense or poetry? Illness or healing agent? Suffer or surrender? Wound or teacher? Hypersensitive hell or empathic connection? Take your pick. Perplexing, maddeningly confounding as with any double-bodied sign (Gemini-Sagittarius-Pisces), you will need to reconcile one-or-the-other/either/or thinking here. And you will learn that the harder you try to solve the riddle of Pisces with ego schemes or fear, the harder life becomes.

You’re living in your own Private Idaho

Living in your own Private Idaho

Underground like a wild potato.

Don’t go on the patio.

Beware of the pool,

blue bottomless pool.

It leads you straight

right through the gate

that opens on the pool. – B52’s Private Idaho

This Pisces Full Moon Eclipse connects with Chiron. Chiron, the wounded healer, holds all the parts of our human experience that feel unjust, unfair and painful. In myth, immortal Chiron sacrificed his immortality so he could be put out of his chronic pain; the only way out of chiron-ic pain is death. Like Pluto, Chiron can connect us to the part of our self that cries, “This is too hard! I want this to end, I want out!” Yet pain is necessary part of the human experience. My source of pain isn’t the same as yours, yet it is something we all share, feel, have in common.

Pisces also connects us to the mystical experience. Here, you can give something larger of your self. Here, you can truly and deeply serve humanity by honoring the sacred in your self. Here, ego-sacrifice, when made intentionally, is a high calling. In this area, faith is your rocket fuel, intuition and imagination your able guides. In this area you will be divinely inspired, disillusioned, lost, redeemed and deeply challenged to see your self clearly. Here, as Martha Beck lovingly writes, we may experience the Storm Before the Calm (not the other way around) so that the horrible loss, failure, ache or shame can give us exactly what we need.

Like a Houdini magic trick, when you’re all tied up in Pisces’ ropes, it’s hard to believe a shift in consciousness is exactly what you need to untie in a millisecond what you’ve been struggling with for years. But it can. I don’t claim to have the magic formula for you, but I can suggest a few things. Start by surrendering to what is. This is your human experience and it’s meant to be happening. If you haven’t done so yet, courageously, humbly, honestly face your self. Finally, remove all seriousness. Add in a smidgen of absurdity. Then relax and laugh at the zaniness of it all. Now you’re in the right frame of mind, what we might call Buddha Mind, to alchemize your own Private Idaho into your own Mystical Experience.

 

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About Jessica Shepherd

Jessica Shepherd is a writer, astrologer and health coach who has studied and practiced modern astrology since 1992. She is the author of A Love Alchemist’s Notebook: Magical Secrets For Drawing Your True Love Into Your Life (Llewellyn, 2010) and the books Venus Signs: Discover Your Erotic Gifts and Secret Desires Through Astrology
(Llewellyn, 2015) and Karmic Dates and Momentary Mates: The Astrology of the Fifth House (Moonkissd, 2014). In 2018, after living in California for twenty years, she relocated to Honolulu, Hawaii with her husband, dog, and cat. Find out more about Jessica at Moonkissd (www.moonkissd.com).

Comments

  1. Penny says

    Sep 19, 2016 at 2:36 pm

    Wow, that was so articulately, insightfully and gorgeously written. One of my absolute favorite posts I’ve read on this site.

    Thank you for that.

    Reply
    • Jessica Shepherd says

      Sep 20, 2016 at 9:29 am

      Thank you for reading, Penny 🙂

      Reply
  2. Britt Kurello says

    Sep 16, 2016 at 4:01 am

    Hey Jessica,
    Thank you for this article. It took me back to my own ” ocean type ” experience. I always recognized the incredible turning point that it was but the addition of the archetypes gives me new perspective. Thanks for having the courage to share!

    Reply
    • Jessica Shepherd says

      Sep 16, 2016 at 1:02 pm

      Thank you and you are welcome, Britt!

      Reply
  3. Patricia says

    Sep 15, 2016 at 11:23 am

    Hello Jessica, thank you for the clarifity you have spoken about Piscean energy.

    I have Mercury, Sun, Saturn and Pluto in the 12th house, with Venus on the 11th/12th house cusp. Venus, Mercury, & Sun are in the sign of Cancer. I have Pisces on the 8th & 9th house cusp. It has taken almost a lifetime of studying astrology to understand the nature of water and the 12th house. Today I see how pain and loss have brought me much insight into my life and my reasons for being here.

    Reply
    • Jessica Shepherd says

      Sep 16, 2016 at 1:01 pm

      Thank you, Patricia! Our charts offer a lifetime of learning, don’t they? xx Jessica

      Reply

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The Moon is in its
Full Phase

in the
Sign of Sagittarius


Today's Lunar Aspects:

  • Moon square Mars, 3:51am  May 18 2022
  • Moon square Neptune, 3:59am  May 18 2022
  • Moon sextile Saturn, 3:59am  May 18 2022
  • Moon square Jupiter, 2:21pm  May 18 2022

Venus is currently
The Morning Star

in the sign of Aries


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m  Conjunction:  Like peas in a pod, planets in conjunction tend to come from the same place. They act together, but it’s also hard to tell them apart. This aspect can increase talent, focus, and intensity (“two are better than one”). Or one planet can disappear as the other dominates. Their connection feels so natural, it’s easy to think everyone blends these planetary energies just as you do—but mostly, they don’t!.

p  Sextile:  Planets in sextile are compatible, though without any fireworks. This aspect doesn’t demand your attention. It quietly presents an opportunity. You can join these archetypal forces. Donna Cunningham has called this the “Oh, that!” aspect, because that’s generally what her clients say when she describes their benefits.  To get the most from sextiles you need to actively work them.

q  Square:  Squares are wild and wonderful—but difficult too. The power struggle between these planets was likely defined in your youth, when they were impossibly challenging. People are usually aware of their squares. They force the issues that make you to grow. And that’s their gift. They ensure you learn your lessons. When you rise to the occasion, they bless you with energy, action, and success.

r  Trine:  Michael Munkasey has dubbed this the “goddess aspect” because it’s so lovely. Identifying talents you may have perfected in a previous life, trines can bring you joy. There’s a nice flow of energy between planets in trine. They support and reinforce each another. But without any struggle, you might take them for granted—neither using nor developing their gifts. An unattended trine can sometimes trick you into negative behaviors.

t  Inconjunct/Quincunx:  Your quincunx planets are innately incompatible. Bringing them into harmonious expression requires constant adjustments. This can be stressful, also motivating. You’ve got to keep changing your process, opinions or attitude—which promotes highly creative solutions.

u  Opposition:  They say opposites attract—and planets in opposition are never far from each other, though they’re constantly bickering. You may be triggered into awareness of this aspect by other people who seem to resist or undermine you.  An opposition can make you feel uncertain, insecure, or discontent, until you can accept and see yourself in both energies. Typically people find it easier to identify with one side and project the other onto unsuspecting others in the outer world.

First House: Personality, physical body, beginnings. Includes the Ascendant and rules physical appearance, the image you project to others, your general outlook on life, how you start things; may describe your role in your family system, often guides your first impression of immediate environment.

Second House: Money and personal finances, sense of self-worth and basic values, personal possessions, talents.

Third House: Communication, thoughts, language skills like writing and speaking, early schooling, siblings and neighbors, short trips, coming and going around town.

Fourth House: Your home, psychological foundations and roots, family, parents, domestic life, instinctive behavior, ancestry, your connection with the past, sense of security, domestic life, real estate. conditions at the end of life.

Fifth House: Children, creativity, romance; pleasure, entertainment, self-expression; all forms of “play”, speculation, gambling, and attitude towards taking risks; hobbies, attitude towards romance, lovers as opposed to partners, attitude towards having fun.

Sixth House: Work and job (as opposed to career), daily life, attitude towards service and coworkers, helpfulness, pets, attitude towards routine and organization, how you refine and perfect your skills.

Seventh House: Partnerships, one-to-one relationships, marriage, the first marriage, the “significant other”, business partnerships, competitors, open enemies, lawyers, mediators, counselors, contracts, negotiations, agreements. clients/the public.

Eighth House: Transformations and crisis, your ability to meet and rebound from crisis and change, sexuality; sex, death and rebirth, rituals and personal growth, your partner’s resources, addictions, psychology, other people’s money, taxes, divorce/alimony, inheritance.

Ninth House: Attitude toward expanding horizons, religious beliefs and personal philosophy, higher education, long-distance travel, morals, foreign languages and cultures, personal truths, publishing, commerce, advertising, your sense of adventure.

Tenth House: Career and profession, your contribution to society, social status, public reputation, material success, how you carve out a public identity for yourself; attitude toward authority figures, parents, caregivers, bosses, governments, attitude towards responsibility, desire for achievement.

Eleventh House: Friends, groups, organizations; hopes, wishes, aspirations, personal goals; your philanthropic attitude, concern for the collective, humanity; like tenth, can bring recognition and honors for fulfilling hopes and dreams.

Twelfth House: What’s hidden beneath the surface, karmic dustbin, limiting childhood/past-life messages, self-undoing, hidden enemies, hidden weaknesses, dreams, secret affairs, lost items, hospitals and prisons, hidden strengths, spiritual studies and soul growth.

A  Sun: Our vitality and magnetism; self-identity, ego.
Roles: The Self, the Hero, the Performer, the King.

B  Moon: Intuition, emotion, nurture.
Roles: The Mother, the High Priestess, the Child.

C  Mercury: Mind; physical dexterity and mental agility.
Roles: The Thinker, the Communicator, the Student, the Trickster, the Merchant, the Thief.

D  Venus: Our capacity for pleasure, receptivity, creativity, and social connection. Also indicates our relationships, self esteem, and financial abundance.
Roles: The Lover, the Seductress, the Artist.

E  Mars: Desire, initiative, anger.
Roles: The Protector, the Athlete, the Warrior.

F  Jupiter: Luck, opportunity, expansion, higher learning, religion.
Roles: The Scholar, the Gypsy, the Traveler, the Monk, the Professor.

G  Saturn: Hard work, commitment, focus, inadequacy, leadership, suffering, loss.
Roles: The Task Master, the Grim Reaper, the Wise Old Man, the Builder, the Cynic, the Boss.

H  Uranus: Change, breakthroughs, upsets, discoveries.
Roles: The Revolutionary, the Humanitarian, the Visionary, the Snob.

I  Neptune: Imagination, spirituality, idealism, addictions, deception, compassion.
Roles: The Artist, the Romantic, the Guru, the Addict, the Martyr, the Victim.

J  Pluto: Transformation, power, psychological dynamics, helplessness.
Roles: The Terrorist, the Detective, the Psychotherapist, the Dictator, shady people.

a  Aries: Pioneering, competitive, selfish, impatient, courageous, reckless, independent, dynamic, domineering, “Me first!”

b  Taurus: Patient, stable, lazy, dependable, practical, sensual, stubborn, artistic, possessive, greedy, gentle, loyal.

c  Gemini: Intelligent, curious, adaptable, quick-witted, restless, clever, scatterbrained, lacking follow-through.

d  Cancer: Nourishing, intuitive, protective, moody, sensitive, maternal, domestic, childish, cautious, creative.

e  Leo: Proud, dignified, vain, expressive, romantic, generous, childish, overbearing, self-assured, creative.

f  Virgo: Perfection-seeking, practical, methodical, petty, critical, studious, discriminating, cautious, never satisfied.

g  Libra: Charming, sociable, peace-loving, refined, diplomatic, artistic, indecisive, apathetic, easily deterred.

h  Scorpio: Passionate, secretive, penetrating, resourceful, suspicious, manipulative, jealous, sarcastic, intolerant, determined, aware.

i  Sagittarius: Freedom-loving, philosophical, optimistic, enthusiastic, careless, impatient, talkative, a know-it-all, broadminded, athletic, honest.

j  Capricorn: Serious, responsible, practical, hardworking, stubborn, brooding, inhibited, status-conscious, domineering, unforgiving.

k  Aquarius: Progressive, individualistic, unpredictable, cold, intellectual, artistic, eccentric, shy, impersonal, scientific.

l  Pisces: Compassionate, intuitive, ungrounded, romantic, impractical, self-sacrificing, seductive, musical, artistic.